My Sister Accused Me of Dressing Inappropriately in Front of Her Husband

This situation involves me, a 22-year-old female, my sister who is 26, and her 30-year-old husband.

To provide some context, my breasts have been disproportionately large compared to my otherwise petite frame since their development. At 5ft 2, I’ve always felt my body looked odd. Consequently, I’ve habitually concealed my figure with oversized hoodies and t-shirts, as I was genuinely ashamed and discontent with my appearance.

Working from the age of 16, my primary objective was to save enough for breast reduction. Thankfully, last year, I managed to afford the surgery. Although my breasts are still relatively large, I’ve never felt as comfortable and happy with my body as I do now. The physical relief from this change has been immense.

Last weekend, my sister and her husband visited our family, and we planned a dinner at a moderately upscale restaurant. For the occasion, I chose to wear jeans and a snug-fitting shirt. While the shirt didn’t reveal my chest, its tight fit outlined my figure.

Initially, the dinner seemed to go well, with everyone engaging in conversation. However, I soon became aware that my brother-in-law was staring at me quite intensely. This made me uncomfortable, and I believe my sister noticed too, as she became noticeably quiet for the rest of the evening. I assumed she was upset with her husband and had observed my discomfort with his stares.

That night, my sister sent me a message accusing me of dressing inappropriately in front of a married man. She suggested I lacked self-respect and implied that my attire was an attempt to seduce her husband. I replied to her, clarifying that it was never my intention, and shared my discomfort about his stares. Her response was dismissive, indicating that if I didn’t want him to stare, I shouldn’t have dressed as I did.

I was deeply hurt by this exchange and sought my mother’s opinion, hoping for support. However, to my dismay, she sided with my sister. This has led me to question my actions and wonder if I should have been more cautious about my attire, especially given that my mother also seemed to think I was in the wrong.

• Instead of calling you out, she should have apologized for *not defending you against her husband’s disgusting behavior* and her husband’s inappropriately wandering eye. Regardless if you were in a bikini or covered head to toe in sweats, YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR OTHER PEOPLE’S ACTIONS OR REACTIONS!!! Shame on her for putting that unwanted and unnecessary blame on you. HolyUnicornBatman / Reddit
• You can’t win with this one, unfortunately. Your sister needs to realize that the issue lies with a) her partner; and b) her mistrust of her partner. He is going to come across women wearing much less in life... Emma_cooks2003 / Reddit
• If someone seduces your husband, then you have a husband problem. It’s not my job to dress for his or your comfort. It’s his job not to be creepy. Disastrous-Nail-640 / Reddit
• Your sister has a husband problem. She needs to direct her anger towards him staring down her younger sister like he isn’t a married man. Your mother is also wrong. A tight-fitting shirt is not dressing inappropriately. smalltown68 / Reddit

• Let’s get the facts here first, (1) the tight t-shirt you admitted to wearing; (2) your sister said it was inappropriate; (3) your mum also said it was inappropriate; (4) it was that tight your BIL couldn’t stop looking, which is kinda weird even if it was tight he shouldn’t have looked. Ask yourself if you didn’t wear a tight t-shirt, this wouldn’t have never happened, correct? Standard_Giraffe_960 / Reddit
• You purposefully wore a tight-fitting shirt. You actually admitted to it. BIL shouldn’t have made this so obvious. Sister needs to deal with her trust issues with her own husband. RidgyFan78 / Reddit
• I’m guessing, since they could see the outline of your breasts, you were not wearing a bra and were wearing a TIGHT t-shirt. Women generally dress that way so that guys (or girls) will look at them. You need to dress however you would feel comfortable in the situation. You are not going to wear a bikini to specific places. So, you wouldn’t want to wear clothes to seduce a family member, including in-laws. dbhathc*** / Reddit